Monday, November 26, 2007

"My Name is Harry Meadows, But You Can Call Me Death"

So I am doing a little news segment on Asian Affairs for our weekly Asian Cultural Society meeting. Of course, there was no way I am going to use the common current affairs material, because, like Canada, who cares. So I dug around trying to find some interesting stories from the past, present, and the foreseeable future of Asia, and I found the following stories on the BBC website of QI (Quite Interesting).
The first story is about Cats in Boxes, continuing my cat theme from previous posts:
Between 1959 and 1961, a British/WHO project accidentally killed lots of cats when treating malaria with DDT in the Sarawak area of Borneo. The DDT also killed cockroaches, which were eaten by cats, which also died and the area became thus infested with rats. Now Sarawak is quite a dense forest region and fighting rats the conventional way was problematic, so the British/WHO team decided to parachute in cats in boxes into the region to fight off the infestation. The boxes had little springs attached to them which would open the box when it hit the ground. Forget about whether it worked or not, the whole concept boggles the mind!
Second story, Adding 2 Feet to the Everest:
Radhanath Sikdar a Bengali mathematician, was the first to measure the peak as 29,000ft, but because he thought people would think he just rounded up to 29,000 feet, he "added" 2 feet to make it 29,002 feet to make it seem legitimate. This was the accepted height of Everest up until 1955, when it became 29,028ft. Incidentaly, Mt. Everest is named after George Everest, the Surveyor General of India at the time, and he pronounced his name as "EVE-rest".
On a side note, apparently the most dangerous sport in the world, purely in number of related accidents and deaths, is kite-flying! Apparently the "manja" string causes many people to lose fingers, and in a few cases, arems and heads! Falling kites have also known to fall in front of motorists causing road accidents and such...
I have a few more, but if any of you have heard anything interesting of late, let me know...

Monday, November 19, 2007

Buy My Umbrella...

How do I sell something that I do not own? You pay me the money, I buy the umbrella, and I give it to you. Simple, right? That's how all brokers work. However, what happens if the person sells an umbrella that does not exist, and the buyer again sells it to someone else who sells it someone else and so on. All the while, no one has actually seen the umbrella since it doesn't really exist, just the promise of it. Now consider everyone who has bought the umbrella had to borrow money to make the purchase and the last buyer borrowed money from the first seller. Who loses?
Exceprt: Ramblings in Econometrics; Maity, Abhishek, Pengu, New York, 2007.

Monday, November 12, 2007

Bradfinger's Shadow

I tried but I could not think of a more banal title.

This is a story, not just any story, but a story. Captain Homomorphism is there. So is Redfield, Sloth, and The Cow. Mass produced Schrodinger's Cats play special weapons. We're not entirely sure what they do, but it's pretty bad. Tamim is the retarded son of a retired triad kingpin. he has a feline fetish. The Bald Pragyan is his brother. He is bald. He wants to kill Tamim so he can take over the Triad Empire. His weapons of choice are exploding kittens. Coupled with a Schrodinger's Cat, the kittens explode, but miraculously survive to be reused. It is still in the testing phase but the manufacturer Clicheco claims it can be used nine times before it needs to be returned to the animal shelter. There is no intrigue so stupid people can read it. There are a few women with nice puns. It is a story told within a story to understand a story that is essential to the the story - take that Faulkner. There isn't a laugh track so you probably will not laugh as the jokes are too sophisticated. They may seem poor and corny - so stupid people can read it - but underneath that what is hidden lies a deeper, funnier, Woodehousian humor, several from the mouth of a nonchalant cigarette.

This is esstentially what I have at the moment. I was bored in Econometrics and didn't want to "write some emails"...

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Experiment #1

Does it seem like self-help websites are getting more and more popular? It may just be me, but during my recent brain-dives into the Internets, I’ve noticed growing number of self-help websites and links to self-help articles. These articles try to inspire readers to "boost productivity” and they provide tips for “living a healthier life,” or “being more successful at _____ (fill in the blank),” etc. My question is does this stuff really work? A lot of people must think so, considering that the self-improvement market is expected to grow to $11 billion by 20081.

Like many other things, individual mileage2 likely varies. In my case, I know that texts and speeches induce only ephemeral motivation at best. Still, I found some articles that look interesting enough, so I've volunteered myself to be the guinea-pig. I will follow the prescriptions of a few articles one at a time for at least 30 days each.

This first article is supposed help me break my habit of staying up for half of the night and sleeping in for half of the day3. I will report back within 30 days…



1. See Wikipedia link in the first sentence. It should also be noted that the revenue generated by self-help websites would only constitute a fraction of the $11 billion.
2. Yes mileage - it's slang. You can try kilometerage, but it just doesn't sound right.
3. Isn't it strange that we "stay up" at night and "sleep in" during the day. What are we staying up above or sleeping in? The blankets?

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

My mind says no but my body says yes

SNL has been crap for awhile now and the only saving graces are the SNL digital shorts. This is the most recent one, in response to the Iranian president's speech/comments at Columbia University. I wonder what Mahmoud would say...


Sunday, September 16, 2007

The Folly of Wearing Neckties

by James Head

Every time I tie a tight and twisted tie
about my throat
I cannot help but laugh and cry
at such an action, such a rote,
for though I know that it's for a show
no longer to protect the coat
or shirt it still seems rather pert
for something once designed for dirt.

And so I use a handkerchief
when messily devouring beef;
Spaghetti sauce is often lost
and ruins silken cloths embossed,
and so I bring a baby's bib
should I decide to try a rib.
I roll up my sleeves and pin my cuffs
trying not to soil my ruff.

And it seems so absurd to me
that possibly - in a century -
humankind may live to see
a tissue (made not to be used through
normal means of wiping a face)
assume a prim and proper place
upon the necks of well dressed gents
who drape some dreary barber's capes
about their napes in order to collect
the wayward contents of their p(a)lates.

(The necktie was actually invented in Coratia as a means to stop food from falling on your shirt while eating...)

Surviving Terminal Three

I haven't written anything in a while and this one's been in the stir for a while and is still an incomplete drama, but should make for decent reading till I can get something more worthwhile up.

August 22


BA 179 touched down at John F. Kennedy Airport in New York City at nine in the evening. So far, it had been an uncharacteristically uneventful journey if you discount the Spanish lesbian couple I met in Calcutta. Immigration and customs went smoothly, my bags were waiting for me at the carousel… everything was in its right place! I was amazed.

It was going to be a wait at JFK for my connecting to Syracuse
so I decided to get a hotel, but in the vicinity, there were only rooms available at the Ramada Inn… for $217 a night. Right, cheap that I am (I don’t even bother to pay $3 for a baggage trolley), I made my way down to terminal 3 to try and find an earlier flight. This was quite a quest in itself, because Delta 3 is a labyrinth of wrong directions and closed doors. Eventually I managed to discover the Delta hideout after following an itinerant group of bumped off gypsies for half an hour.

There was no earlier flight. I would have to take the 1:15 pm flight the next afternoon. Without asking Ron to do the math, I figured that was a good 15-hour wait. I needed to set up camp for the night. After several nights spent at airports all over Europe I was quite accustomed to this, nothing to take pride in, but it did take one back to the ‘hunter-gatherer’ days. First, seek out abandoned luggage trolleys to hold your baggage, and then find good shelter close to a freshwater source and a toilet. Finally, before attempting to snatch some shuteye, it is advisable to secure your baggage with off-the-cuff anti-theft systems like grappling hooks, stray wires, whatever is at hand.

Unfortunately, the Delta Domestic Departures terminal is not built to host the needs of temporary hobos like myself. There were exactly two sets of waiting seats able to accommodate precisely nine people give or take a couple, literally. Another overnighter couple had annexed one bench and I lost my seat on the other when I went to use the facilities.

For a while, I just wandered around the now closed terminal, pushing my trolley, wishing Hann were around. Hann knew, through experience, how to hold on to territorial claims and was quite adept at finding lush green pastures. Eventually I decided to build my own shelter with the parts I had. I managed to smuggle myself behind enemy lines and steal a bunch of chairs from the check-in counters. The idea was to make a bed with six roller-chairs. It was a bad idea. I fell. Twice.


I was also getting a little hungry. Rations were running low. I had one bar of Dairy Milk, a KitKat, 2 bottles of Black Label, and a jar of chili-garlic spread. The terminal would open at 5, so I had to wait another six hours before more food would become available. Restraint was necessary.


I made a makeshift weight-holder using my trolley, backpack, and suitcase. I was not a comfortable arrangement, but I was not sleepy anyway, jet lag. I killed a couple of hours watching ‘Mona Lisa Smile’ that I had downloaded for Gupta and was still on my computer and watching people come and go. I had to get up and walk around every once in a while to stop my backside from falling asleep… it had been lethargically resting for the last 18 hours on the plane.

August 23

At 3:40 in the morning, I decided to give up on my attempts to get some sleep and started writing this, boredom being my sheer motivation. I have nothing else to add right now. I will continue to relate in real time if anything worthy of interest happens…

So after six cool-mints, ten hours, and $25 in excess baggage fines later I finally have my boarding pass… six hours before departure. I sit on the floor to charge my laptop and immediately security begins to ask my complexion a serious of arbitrary questions. Once it charges up a bit more, enough to watch a few episodes of ‘Entourage’, I will go through security.


Through security. First, I eat, good old Flaming Wok, or such… Chinese fast food places all look the same. Sleepy, so sleepy, and sick… sick from apathy and malnutrition, not to mention the head pounding dhickkao dhichkao music I have been subject to all night on the loud speakers. Please *insert supreme power of religious faith here*, will you not end it soon? Can you feel the sewage in my stream of consciousness bogging down my thinking?


After making pleasant conversation with a gentleman from the Emirates, and a short nap I find out that the
1:15 flight to Syracuse has been cancelled due to bad weather! In the summer – are you fucking kidding me? They give us the choice between taking a bus to Syracuse at 2 or taking the 5 pm flight, but no one has any idea if the $25 they charged me for excess baggage will be refunded if I take the bus. I met another chap from India going to SUNY-IT also in the same boat as me. If the 5 pm flight fails to arrive, I am quite fucked. The board says flight is on time, but there are still three long, excruciating hours to go and even then, things are not concrete.

I tried to call Ashlee to let her know what has happened so far, but the machine just ate up my dollar. Bhen chod, aaj to bad luck hi kharab hai… I had to call Amit with my
UK roaming and asked him to let Ashlee know. I hope she got the message.

They just announced that the flight to
Buffalo does not have a functioning toilet so passengers should use the toilet at the terminal before boarding. Is it any wonder why Delta is going bankrupt? I am slowly reaching boiling point. I might lose it anytime. Will this be a repeat of Chicago? They told us we are on our own if the 4:55 is cancelled. I hate flying. Worst-case scenario I think a bunch of us will cab it… there are enough irate customers here.

September 16

Eventually we did fly out... albeit at 10pm in the evening. The tornado had subsided. But my bags were lost, and they took four days to return them, without compensation. Never fly Delta ladies and gentlemen, never. Rather wishy-washy wrap up to the story, but I can't get back into the groove...

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

End of the world???

What the hell has happened to this site???

Three out of five of our members were supposed to have endless free hours ahead of them. but what is this?

Is this it...the end of this world???

We need a savior!

Thursday, August 16, 2007

After a long time!

Hey everyone! Sorry for being away from this site for such a long time. I was back home in Nepal and I just came back yesterday. Right now, I am desperately fighting my jet lag and trying to stay awake in my orientation-leader-training-sessions.

My trip from Nepal to Hamilton has always been exciting, for some reason. And as you might have guessed, I have a story again.

My journey started off with a blast. The flight was overbooked. But thanks to the airport staffs I knew in Kathmandu, I was able to secure the best economy-class seat for myself. However, my excitement quickly disappeared when I realized that the guy who sat next to me had the habit of slurping his drinks. And he kept on taking drinks one after another. God that was irritating! But that was a minor case in front of what I had to hear at the arrivals. Apparently, due to some technical problems, the staffs in Kathmandu had to take 1500kg (approx. 3300 lbs, for Americans) of luggage out of the plane. But the staffs in Delhi told us that it would arrive in the very next flight in the evening and that it would be delivered to our address within 12 hrs. I made the mistake of blindly trusting them, and so, after leaving my contact details, I went out of the airport to find Maity, who had been waiting for me for 2 hrs.

Not surprisingly, I didn't get my luggage that day. Tried calling them several times, but in vain. The next day when I got hold of one of the employees, he thought I am an American and tried to talk to me in an American accent. Phrases like 'Yeah, man, see ya!' and 'No probs, man!' were commonly used. It was a nice try but it sounded odd after hearing an Indian accent first and besides, I don't think it was supposed to be such an informal conversation anyway.

The following days of my journey also had something interesting lined up for me. London Heathrow welcomed me with one of the longest queues at the Immigration. Spent almost four full hours standing there. The day after, the Virgin Atlantic staffs there decided to charge me for carrying 1 kg of extra weight. I could do nothing but pay. The flight to JFK wasn't really smooth either. Frequent turbulence hits kept us awake. The best incident took place right before we landed at JFK. An air hostess was taking a glass of water to the passenger behind me. Just when she was about to pass me, the plane hit a major turbulence. And before I could react to the shock, I realized that I had to deal with another shock first. And this is not something I have ever heard or seen in real life or even in movies. She had lost her balance due to the turbulence and had literally landed on my laps. And before even trying to get up, she started giggling. Soon, the whole cabin burst into laughter. Her face was red. I must say that was an awkward moment. But I am happy that it was a cute young brunette and not a big fat guy. This incident reminded me of the Indian chewing gum ad I watched when in Nepal. I am sure many of you guys know what I am talking about.

Well! apart from that, nothing was really exciting. Came back and now I am trying to settle back at Hamilton after one full year's gap. Everything seems weird now.

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Great Scott!

My much anticipated (well...maybe) first post. I thought I'd share a couple cartoons that I found on the Internets.


Since some American schools are now teaching Intelligent Design, perhaps we should explore contrasting theories in the other sciences too...
Your unborn child wants a philosopher's stone for Christmas.

Founding Fathers vs. Fox News - Round 1: Separation of Church and State

You can find more cartoons here.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Thriller here tonight

I don't know if any of you have seen these already but I saw them for the first time tonight and there are no words.



Saturday, July 07, 2007

Sunlight will fall

I don't have any rants, any stories, or much of anything, really. The only reason I am posting is because I uploaded an album for someone and didn't want the link (nor the hour it took to upload the music) to go to waste. I figure you kids might be interested and if not, then oh well I suppose.

The album I uploaded is Chungking's latest album, Stay Up Forever. If you haven't heard of them...They're a British band (well, duo is more like it) with a female lead singer whose voice is very sultry, smooth, and quite unique. I would say Chungking's sound is in the category of trip-hop/electronica/chill-out. They've been compared to Goldfrapp, Morcheeba, and Portishead and I can agree with the first two but not Portishead, though, because I've never heard their music. Anyway, there's not much more I can say because you just have to listen to really understand. Thanks, youtube:

Chungking - Come With Me (From their 1st album, We Travel Fast)


Chungking - Love Is Here To Stay (From Stay Up Forever)

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

"Where There Is Faith, There Is No Fear!"

These words have been immortalized in the annals of movie lore as the tag line of perhaps the most monumental movie of our times, "Aap Ka Suroor".

Monday, June 25, 2007

Rant

I want to rant. It's been a long time since I've ranted. There are many things to rant about, starting with that damn HCL commercial. I want to punch that damn HCL employee and what kind of a company provides a helicopter to go overseas but doesn't provide transport to the helipad that's in the middle of the desert... and the HCL employee can't even afford a taxi and has to hitch a ride from none other than an investment banker who's driving an SUV without gas in the middle of nowehere. That's believable.



Having said that, the new Happy Dent commercial is easily one of the best ads I've seen on TV recently.



On the other hand I re-read "The Half Blood Prince" in anticipation of "Deathly Hallows"... so many questions, only one book to answer. Potter can't be the seventh horcrux can he? Less than 30 days to go!

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Fairies, Claymores and Bagpipes

[I wrote this for Zorro on Doughnuts]...

First post after being a member for...I don't even remember. It was going to be on Japanese pop/rock, but Yohan's post on The Arctic Monkey's and my recent hike around Scotland and RockNess 2007 made me change my mind.

I haven't been able to find copies of all these songs because many of them I just heard live or in pubs and buses across Scotland, but you can find most of them on www.radioblogclub.com, a rather remarkable site.

Unlike their Irish neighbours, Scottish musicians have never really made a big impact in the rock and roll world. Perhaps the best known names would be Franz Ferdinand and now, KT Tunstall (who actually went to college with Snow Patrol and our good friend, Duncan)... and if you really push it, the Young brothers from AC/DC who were half Scottish. It so turns out that the tiny nation of Scotland has churned out some pretty popular music, many of which sounds too American or British to make us think that they'd be of Scottish pedigree. After all, what would we expect Scottish music to sound like? Screaming cats and bagpipes? Well, here's a small sampling, make up your own mind...

First we have Snow Patrol, a band formed in University of Dundee where Duncan went to college. These guys are pretty much like any other american alternative band, but it's worth a listen to some of their stuff; "Run", "Chasing Cars", "Signal Fire", "You're All I Have" and "Spitting Games". You might have heard the first three songs in the disastrous Spiderman 3 movie.

Paolo Nutini is another up and coming musician with some smooth beats, semi-gruff voice, and catchy lyrics. Here are a few recommendations: "New Shoes", "Jenny Don't Be Hasty", and "Last Request".

I don't know if you remember an old jeans ad with the song "pressure, pressure, pressure", but that was The Zutons. They've done some great work with "Pressure Point", "Valerie", and "Oh Stacey". Although they supposedly formed in Liverpool, Duncan claims that they were initially led by 2 Glaswegians and a prat from Edinburgh.

Before our trip to Scotland, Pragyan and I were discussing what heavy rock bagpipes would sound like and the answer to our queries were the Peatbog Faeries - another group from Skye. I don't have any particular song to recommend but you can try, "Welcome to Dun Vegas", "Wacko King Hako", and "Scots on the Rocks".

If you want to know about the McGreggor massacre or some good old Scottish folk music, The Corries would be an appropriate choice. They do a lot of great traditional songs seeped in history and lore like "Portkey Kid", "Bonnie Prince Charlie" and other patriotic songs like "Flower of Scotland".

Another band with dubious origins, Alabama 3 was formed in Brixton, England, but again Duncan claims they're actually Scots, but as long as they make good music, it doesn't matter right? They're perhaps most famous for "Woke Up This Morning" which was used for the opening sequence for "The Sopranos". I'd also recommend, "Hello... I'm Johnny Cash", and "Peace in the Valley".

Box o' Bananas performed live at the King Haakon Pub in Kyle, Isle of Skye in Northern Scotland while we were there... it's hard to imagine this tiny island in the middle of nowhere have produced some of the biggest names in Scottish modern music and also hosts the annual Skye Music Festival. Coming back to the band, BoB combines a lot of traditional Scottish instruments [read: pipes] with high amp guitars and keyboards. They're great to listen to live, not to mention bloody funny. I couldn't find anything on www.radioblogclub.com, so good luck...

The first Aberfeldy song I heard was "Vegetarian Restaurant". To be honest I really haven't heard much from these guys, but I'm looking around for some more. Radioblogclub has a limited collection for these guys. Try "Tom Weir" and "Summer's Gone".

The Proclaimers are the quitessential Scottish band. The identical twins were voted "the most Scottish band" and are perhaps best known for their song "I'm Gonna Be [500 miles]"... you know, the one that goes, "and I will walk 500 miles, and I will walk 500 more..." These guys are from the little town of Fief just north of Edinburgh and people are suprised they haven't become British sellouts! You've probably already heard "Letter From America", "Sunshine on Leith" and "King of the Road".

Another Dundee Band, The View, has also produced some decent... although certain people seem to hate them. Also accused of being American sellouts, people have called them a cross between The Arctic Monkey's and The Proclaimers, and the worst new band! Make up your mind: "Wasted Little DJs", "Same Jeans", and "Face for the Radio".

Lastly I leave you with a surprise Isle of Skye master DJ: Mylo who along with KT Tunstall was probably the biggest hit of RockNess 2007. I'm sure there are many more great bands and musicians I've missed out, but these are all the guys I know about. Enjoy! Sorry I couldn't provide the songs, but they're all there on www.radioblogclub.com.

I'll write a normal post sometime soon. I wonder where everyone else has disappeared?

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Who are you?

I just realized that although it has been a while since we started conversing through this site, I have almost no idea who you all are. Might be a good idea if we all introduced ourselves to one another.

OK...since I brought this up...

Me - Pragyan Pradhan from Nepal, a student at Hamilton College, New York - currently chilling at LSE for a year - hopefully will get a BA degree in Math and Economics in 2008. Had wasted more than a year after high school doing nothing - now in a four year college - which means another year down the drain (compared to three-year colleges in Nepal). Plans after graduation - donno yet - will probably do something in business. What else...oh ya...I will be teaching Hindi next year with Maity. Now isn't that ironic? I have never had a single Hindi lesson in my lifetime.

Friday, April 27, 2007

Those days are gone...

Yesterday, a friend of mine said to me, 'How can you drink this? It's disgusting.'

Maity and I, with three others, decided to go to a pub in the afternoon yesterday. It had been a while since I went to a pub. Without any second thought, I asked for a double black label with ice. Priya decided to take a sip from my glass, and that was when she said that to me.

I had my beer days, followed my gin/vodka/rum and now I have switched to whiskey. I also used to say at one point in life, 'geez, whiskey is damn bitter'. May be I am getting old, or I am just getting tired of mixed drinks. I like whiskey. Whiskey is good. What do ladies' know about a gentleman's drink anyway (sincere apologies to exceptions)?

Poor Maity was warned by the bartender for drinking whiskey without an ID. I almost got into trouble for giving him the drink.

What's worse than going to an expensive theater in London and not liking the play at all? - Drinking tons of expensive alcohol at a London pub and not getting drunk even a bit.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Introducing...

Friar Mite D’Asia the Rurr
Frair D’Asia hails from the marshes of Klean-tun, although ancient tales hint of a youth spent in myriad lands. Apprenticed in the dark arts of Comsigh at Hymlton, he quickly rose to become an apostle of the High Church of Muk. D’Asia revels in the excretion of information and always carries with him a nameless tome of apocryphal knowledge. He also has the distinction of being the only one to tame one of the Akura beasts of Nippon and together perfect the ways of Speidlimit. In his time at Hamilton, he developed a life long hatred for the barbaric Cake and swore to destroy all their kin with his powerful Majik of Youman. We wish him good luck on his quest.
[With sincere apologies to Y'Jinn the Scribe.]

Monday, April 16, 2007

How Can I Tell You?

EDIT: When I first wrote the post, a lot of my friends actually had no idea what I was talking about. And it was around 2pm (US EST), mind you. Kind of reminds me of 9/11 when I was in school and no one had a clue till fairly late.

I mean, I agree with the comments that if you don't know anybody who was affected (either directly or indirectly), you are quite removed from the situation so it's silly to get upset. But only to a certain extent. (And I do know of two people who go to VT...they were high school acquaintances, the sort of people you only talk to in class. Both are fine.) What happened yesterday is upsetting. What happens all over the world every damn day is upsetting. I know I would be lying if I said I did not feel at least a little affected by ridiculously horrible events I read about or see on the news every day. In that slight moment when you read/hear about something, one must be feeling something. I mean, are we really going to kid ourselves and say we are completely unaffected? Things do not and should not have to happen to our person or people we know in order for us to feel something, even if only to impassion our own lives or to spark inspection of the environment around us.

Three universities and a few other primary and secondary schools had to close today because of bomb threats. Stupid copycat shit. I mean, VA Tech already had cops crawling all over the campus because of two bomb threats in the previous weeks leading up to Monday, a shooting that occurred on campus in August of last year (by someone unrelated to the campus), and the shooting in the dorm that morning, and still, it happened. I can't even imagine...

Yesterday, the Chicago Sun Times kept claiming sources said the shooter was a Chinese student on a visa from Shanghai. They must feel stupid now. Bet those fact checkers will be fired. Immediately after news spread that the shooter was Asian, the racist shit I heard about was disgusting. Just because of one lone psychotic Asian guy. What about the Columbine shooting? And the clock tower shooting at the University of Texas, the guy who killed 24 people in Killeen, Texas, or Manson, Bundy, Dahmer...need I say more? They were all white. What does that say? Racial profiling makes no sense. People are pathetic.

And this whole thing about how guns don't kill people, people kill people is just stupid. People on the news were arguing that if students were allowed to carry concealed weapons, the shooter could've been stopped. So ludicrous. First of all, what were the chances that someone in that building carried a gun? Second of all, enabling more teenagers/young adults to carry guns is the worst, most careless idea ever. If anything, there should be gun control that is strict as hell. If that Asian guy didn't have access to guns, he most likely would not have killed so many people. I mean, say if he had just a knife or something. People kill people. But people without guns kill less people.


Original post:
I don't believe any of you reading this are in the States (though please correct me if I'm wrong) so you may or may not have heard.

This morning, an Asian man opened fire on the Virginia Tech campus and killed over 30 people, including himself. Information is still coming in but what is known for certain is that there was a shooting in a dorm and then two hours later, the man went to a classroom on the other side of campus and shot the majority of the victims there. There has been no official confirmation on whether the guy was a student or what. However, rumor has it the guy was a student and snapped when he found out his girlfriend cheated on him. I got that from a friend who has a friend who has a lot of friends who attend VA Tech. If that is the motivation for this, it makes things that much worse because it's such a stupid, senseless thing to kill people over. But then again, what exactly is worth killing someone over?

Wax philosophical

As you may or may not know, Hamilton is pretty much a tundra. It's a school on a hill and it snows from sometime in October (usually) to the end of April. In fact, it's snowing quite hard right now as I type. That's an understatement, actually. It's more like a blizzard. Coincidentally, the accepted student open house is today. I wonder how many will decide not to come because of this.

I, for one, however, wish it would snow harder. Another snow day is more than fine by me. I need more time to write my (insert choice expletive here) thesis. It will be a pain to dig my car out of the snow later but I think it's worth it. Besides, I need the exercise.

Thursday, April 05, 2007

What kind of f*ckery is this?

So I typed this fairly long post earlier but I stepped away for a bit, came back, and found that my browser hates me and ate my post. I'm too lazy to re-type it all so I will just write about something else.
When I was commenting in the previous post and was asked where I was from, it reminded me of the most frequent responses I'd get after I said "New Jersey."
Top 5:
5. North or South? (Representin' South Jerz! South Jersey > North Jersey)
4. Isn't that NYC's landfill? Haha (You've got it backwards, buddy! Though North Jersey does stink, what with all the factories up there.)
3. Ah, the Garden State. Why's it called that? (We've got a lot of farm land and generate a lot of flora and produce.)
2. Joisey??! Hahaha Where's your accent?? (There is no accent!)
DRUMROLL - And the number one response I get is...
1. *stare for a second* No, I mean really, where are you from? (Like it's impossible that I come from NJ! But really, if you want to ask me which ethnicity I am, just "grow some balls" and ask!)
I can say with 99.99% confidence that every time I get the #1 response, it has come from a white person. Don't mean to be racist but it's true. When I was younger, I would be clueless and just kept repeating myself until he/she elaborated with, "So were you born here?" And there's also: "Oh, NJ. So how long have you lived here (or there, depending on where I am)?" Unfortunately, I don't recall the exact age when I realized these were thinly veiled indicators of ignorance. Now, depending on how I'm asked, where I am, who I'm speaking to, and my mood, I give different answers. Sometimes I tell the truth, sometimes I make shit up and give some very random answers, and sometimes I would be a complete asshole and say "Earth" or something like it. It has become quite amusing, really, seeing people's responses to my ridiculous answers.
The title of this post is quite fitting. If you may not have noticed, all of my posts have titles that come from either a movie, song, and tv show, or may be a hackneyed quote/phrase. Anyway, this one is no different. It's a line from the lyrics in a song by Amy Winehouse, a British soul/jazz/r&b singer, called "Me & Mr. Jones." She says fuckery. How can you resist?
Amy Winehouse - Me & Mr. Jones
Amy Winehouse - You Know I'm No Good
EDIT: So Hamilton has this music festival type thing every year near the end of the school year called Mayday. I think this started in 2004. Anyway, last year, they brought The New Pornographers and some other people I can't remember. This year, they're bringing Asobi Seksu!!! I'm so excited!! (Well, actually, the headliner is Citizen Cope but I've never heard of him 'til now. Checked him out on myspace and I must admit I'm not a fan.) If you've never heard of Asobi Seksu, they're a shoegazing indie/pop rock band from NYC whose name means "playful sex" in Japanese. The lead singer, Yuki Chikudate, sings in both English and Japanese against a background of lush guitars to create this surreal, dreamy sound. It's hard to explain so you'll just have to listen to find out what I'm talking about.
Asobi Seksu - Thursday
Asobi Seksu - Lions and Tigers

Saturday, March 31, 2007

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Savvy?

So I'm taking a Comparative Literature/English course called The Detective Story this semester. Yesterday, my professor mentioned an article he read online about a professor at MIT who coaches kids how to "ace" the new writing portion of the SAT and uses this to lend credence to his argument that standardized writing assessments are only harming students' writing abilities. It's quite disturbing, really.
Rumor has it that Johnny Depp will be in Sin City 2. Depp was originally slated to play Jackie Boy (Benicio Del Toro's role) but couldn't fit it into his schedule. This new role will supposedly be much more substantial. I, for one, am excited over this news. Johnny Depp can do no wrong. Well, aside from Secret Window, From Hell, The Astronaut's Wife...those are the only ones that pop out at the moment. Never watch those movies. If you have already, well, I feel your pain.
Maybe this song can help assuage that. I came across this song from Sneaky Sound System, an Australian band, on one of my bookmarked music blogs and fell in love with it. It's hella catchy/danceable, as in it's pretty much club music. If while listening to this song, not even one part of your body is impelled to move to the beat, then you are just no fun. Besides, this is not your regular crappy vocal overlapped with synth beats kind of dance song. It's more like a cross between The Sounds, Blondie, synth beats, and just a pinch of Kate Bush-like vocals. Give it a listen. ("You can think I'm wrong, but that's no reason to quit thinking." - House)
Sneaky Sound System - I Love It
Speaking of which, there's an all new House tonight. About damn time, I'd say. Here's another quality quote from the great philosopher, House: "Perseverance does not equal worthiness. Next time you want to get my attention, wear something fun. Low-riding jeans are hot."

Sunday, March 25, 2007

“You Can’t Always Get What You Want!” [1]

There is a lot to talk about for this bored meeting.
First on the agenda is the induction of one Allison “Chouball” Chou into this blog. A few more names and we will be like the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Let me tell you a bit about Chou. Never believe a word of what she says. Half the lies she says aren’t true. What else do you expect from a former employee of a sketchy New York tax firm? Her favoured drink is double vodka on the rocks with a dash of tangerine. She drives a space age Honda Civic and owns a DVD of “Miami Vice”. We look forward to hearing more of her apocryphal stories…

Jae, Amit, Shraddha, and Noah were visiting for the last couple of weeks. It was great fun. Noah and I went to watch Patrick Stewart as Prospero in a superb RSC production of “The Tempest”. All through the show, I was always expecting him to say, “Engage”, but it never came. Later Amit, Noah, and I went to watch Monty Python’s “Spamalot”. Although we had crappy seats, it was a very enjoyable show, but not in the same league as T. However, the best play I’ve seen in the West End is still “The Woman in Black”, which I went to watch twice, once with Kunj and once with Elena.
My Economics teacher is expecting a child in a couple of weeks. They’ve named her Helena, which brings me to the movie “DOA: Dead or Alive” – don’t watch it. We also got around to watching “300”. Quite an intense movie; lot’s of blood and gore but it’s not “Sin City”.
Jae and I went on a Beatles trip to Liverpool. It was an excellent trip, complete with singing along at a live performance (Paul Caspa) at the famous The Cavern Pub. Back in London we went down to Abbey Road and tried hard to duplicate the album cover, but we were too spazzed out to get it right!

St. Patrick’s Day was another experience. We went to watch the parade and the live performances at Trafalgar Square and Leicester Square and topped off the day with a couple of pints of Guinness at The Blue Posts pub. Which isn’t anything special since we got drunk ten nights in a row. We love our party hats.
Wimbledon was a very disappointing outing. Not only were we lost but it also started to rain and the construction kept us out of the grounds. The museum was cool with some stunning AV demos, but for six quid that’s the least you’d expect. All other pictures, at least the good ones are on Facebook.
My plans for Spain and Portugal went down the drain when I told the Finnish embassy to “F*ck off” and cancelled my visa. I can’t imagine why any one would want to go to Finland and on top of that they people at the embassy don’t want you to go either. Gets my vote for worst embassy in the world. I hate Finland. So I’m stuck here in London. Maybe I’ll still go to Morocco and Scotland, but as of now, I’m too pissed off to think straight.
To top things off we have the sad demise of the Indian Cricket Team. 'Tis a sad day when Ireland makes it past the league stage and India doesn't. I will not sulk, not even when Arsenal is beaten by Everton.
[1]: The Rolling Stones. Seems to capture our thoughts.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

The World I Know

Yesterday, I was supposed to watch 300 but damn old man winter foiled my plans. The stupid groundhog was wrong. On Wednesday and Thursday, nice weather was had by all and it was in the 60's and 70's, respectively. The sun was out and if I had brought home some flip flops, I sure as hell would have busted them out and displayed my little piggies. But then Friday rolled around and in came the snow/sleet/freezing rain. I say the Hamilton weather followed me home. (A friend of mine retorted with, "Then you need to get your ass back up there.") Seeing as I am a newbie when it comes to driving, my mom forbade me from driving in the ridiculous weather.

Due to the fact that I could not drive, my friend had to pick up me and our other friend, who I was originally supposed to pick up. During this entire process, everyone and their moms were out and about on the roads. (Didn't people know that they shouldn't drive in such weather?!?!) Not only this, but everyone was driving so ridiculously slow, I don't think it could have even been considered driving. Surely it's safe to drive slowly and cautiously in bad weather, but the key word here is drive, as in move. By the time the third person in our little posse was in the car, we had approximately 10 minutes to make the movie in the theater that was at least 15 minutes away in normal conditions. Needless to say, we missed 300. But the extra time it took to get to the theater was not a waste. As the saying goes, it doesn't matter what you're doing but who you're with.

So yeah, we ended up watching The Namesake, which was the only movie we did not have to wait 1.5 - 2 hours to watch. The movie was a pretty solid story about culture, family, and discovery. That is, once you can get past the fact that Kumar ("What is that, five o's and two u's?"), I mean Kal Penn, is acting in a dramatic role.

During our long drive to the theater, a song came up on my friend's mix CD which made us all reminisce about the old days. Those who know me know I love the 90's. Everything was just better back then - the music, the movies, the tv shows, the attitudes of people in general, and etc. Unless my bias is due entirely to the fact that the 90's made up my childhood and thus, who I am and...I digress. Anyway, the song was the Cake cover of the notorious "I Will Survive" and, in my opinion, the greatest cover of any song I have ever heard. Cake truly made the song their own, what with the guitar riffs and almost lackadaisical vocals.

And because that song put me into a nostalgic mood, here are some of my favorite 90's songs/favorite songs of all time.

Cake - I Will Survive
Foo Fighters - Everlong
Collective Soul - Run
Better Than Ezra - At the Stars
Spacehog - In the Meantime
New Radicals - You Get What You Give
Ben Folds Five -Brick
Goldfinger - Here in Your Bedroom
Toad the Wet Sprocket - Come Down
Primitive Radio Gods - Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth with Money in My Hand

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Just So Stories [1]

Last week, James Head and I entered into a little duologue similar to our duel of bad poetry in October 2005. This time each of us had 12 hours to respond. Here are the results so far. It's still going on and I'll put up the new ones if we come up with anything good.
James:
"So, what about that big, glowing, floating hat behind you?"
"Are you retarded?"
"Yes."
Maity:
So a baby walks into a topless bar, and is really confused. Then he puts his hat down and gets a drink. All the girls try to hook up with him. They coo, whine and serenade him with intelligent conversation. He puts down his scotch and says, "Sorry ladies, I don't speak retard", and walks away without his milk.
James:
So the milkman is going on his early morning route when he comes across Mrs. Macabee - who is in her front yard, in her nightgown, watering the petunias. The milkman is a little puzzled by this, since it's 4:30 in the morning and it's still dark out. He approaches Mrs. Macabee and says, "Exuse me. Mrs. Macabee? Your petunias are on fire." And she says,"Well that's why I'm watering them, asshole!"
Maity:
So Mr. Petunia hated his name. All his life he had been teased about flowers. "Wimp in the Wind" they sang for him. He traveled far and wide and sought a wise man to weed his thoughts.
"Why must I live with such a name?" he asked the wise man.
"Because you are a flower, my son."
The next day, Mr. Petunia shot himself.
James:
So they're shooting a scene for this movie at a local diner. It is supposed to be a fight scene between two men, but the second man is nowhere to be found. For three hours they wait, meanwhile they are constantly trying to reach him by phone but to no avail. Just when they are about to give up and leave, the makeup artist volunteers to play his part.
"I'll do it," she says "I know his entire part."
The director says, "But you're a woman. The part calls for a man. You don't even resemble him slightly!"
And she says, "Well you don't even resemble Danny Devito's dick!"
Maity:
So Danny DeVito is playing chess with the leader of his local motorbike gang - The Unsteady Serpents when his phone rings.
"That's my missus", he says, "she has a special vibrator."
"Aww phooey, you're just saying that", the leader replied.
"No, no, really, you do."
And they made love on the giant chessboard.
James:
So Gary Kasparov is playing Deep Blue when Deep Blue takes one of his pawns en passant. Being Russian, Kasparov tries to accuse Deep Blue of cheating.
"Confounded machine!" he cries "Somehow the Americans fixed it to cheat against me!"
Deep Blue says, "En passant - it's French, bitch, you wouldn't understand."
Kasparov drinks himself into a stupor and goes on a rampage, destroying six chessboards and a child's bicycle.
Maity:
So Tweedledee and Tweedledum were riding their tricycles down Le Rouge de Spassky when they smell Chinese food in the crisp night air of Champagne. Tn'T park their ride on the curb and walk into an old drinking house made entirely of used Dell computers. They had heard rumors that the maitre'd there spoke a Spanish that reeked with an odd New Zealand accent. Tn'T didn't really care though, tonight was not a night to give in to their explosive nature.
As they enter, the maitre'd walks over to them and asks "qué la voluntad usted tiene?"
Tweedledum just shakes his head.
Tweedledee glances up from the menu and says "I'll have the sex on toast, please. [2]"
James:
So a clown heard about this great dish called sex on toast from his colleagues Messrs. Dee and Dum, and is riding his bicycle to the diner where it is served. While rounding a corner his front tyre sinks into a huge pothole and the wheel shoots off, hitting a small child and killing him instantly. The clown is ejected head first over the handle bars and into an open manhole cover, but instead of making a clean entrance he hits every possible rung of the ladder going down, breaking all the bones in his body above the waist. He is rushed to the hospital but is pronounced dead shortly thereafter. Meanwhile, the mother of the dead child decides she cannot go on living and throws herself into oncoming traffic and dies.
Maity:
So in a hospital just outside Panhole City, a large man, clad in Samurai battle armour and a doctor's apron, walked into the waiting room carrying a large katana and a grave expression. The sword was soaked in blood and left a crimson trail as he walked through the room to a very worried looking couple at the far end. The couple looked at him questioningly and the samurai said, "I'm sorry ma'am but your clown died in surgery."
(To be continued... maybe)
[1] Nothing to do with Mr. Kipling at all.
[2] Consider it as a homage to Murmurlark.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

At my signal, unleash Hell!

I may be of the female gender but I enjoy more than my share of action flicks. Most of the time, I just check my brain and semblance of feminism at the door. I mean, who doesn't enjoy a brainless movie about stuff blowing up; needless, exaggerated fights/deaths; and/or a hero who saves the day against impossible, mounting odds or honorably dies trying? I sure do.

Before the movie Sin City came out, I had never heard of it nor the comic book. All I knew after watching the trailers was that I HAD to watch this movie because a) it looked kick-ass and b) Clive Owen was in it. The same pretty much applies to 300. Epic fight scenes? Check. Good-looking guy(s) that most guys want to emulate and girls can squeal over? Check. (Gerard Butler)

And of course, there are always the critics of these action movies. Some said Sin City was too gory. Noted. But as they say, if you can't handle the heat, get out of the kitchen! If you can't handle the gore/violence, don't watch it. Plain and simple. I personally hate scary movies so I will never be caught dead watching one. Ever again, that is. I've learned my lesson. (Though I am not afraid of the so-called scary slasher movies which are not scary at all. I'm just scared of the weird, mess-with-your-head shit like IT and pretty much every Japanese horror movie, especially those with scary-looking little kids that make me never want to have kids of my own.) Critics of 300 have used excuses like the violence factor, the innane plot (hello, it's an action movie!), and the recently expoused excuse: it will provoke anger toward a certain peoples. I read an article saying that Iranians were in an uproar over the movie, which portrays Persians as "decadent, sexually flamboyant, and evil in contrast to the noble Greeks." Some even go so far as to say the movie is Hollywood's declaration of war against Iranians because it is insulting and promotes hatred towards Persians. First of all, I'm sure more than half the Americans who will actually go to watch 300 do not have the slightest inkling that Iran is in any way related to Persia. I bet many think it's a separate country and some may not have even heard of Persia. It's sad but probably true. Second of all, since when does an action movie, based on a comic no less, wholly and acurately represent a peoples? This whole thing is reminiscent of how Kazakhs were mad about the Borat movie. Movies are movies. They're one or a few people's take on something and is, oftentimes, a skewed version of reality or a total deviation from it. But above all, movies are for entertainment. People just need to get the sticks out of their asses.

End note: Anyone actually watch 300? I've heard it's been topping the box office and both good and bad reactions. Well, I'll be seeing it soon enough.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Have you any wool?



This is not a joke. I think this just may top Snakes on a Plane.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE by John Cleese


To the citizens of the United States of America, in the light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The Right Honourable Tony Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed. To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
1. You should look up revocation in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up aluminium. Check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and 'neighbour'; skipping the letter 'U' is nothing more than laziness on your part. Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters. You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z' (pronounced 'zed' not 'zee') and the suffix ize will be replaced by the suffix ise. You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra' e.g. Edinburgh. You are welcome to re-spell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you can't cope with correct pronunciation. Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up vocabulary.
Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. Look up interspersed. There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your vocabulary then you won't have to use bad language as often.
2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of -ize.
3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents are not limited to cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian (Daphne in Frasier). You will also have to learn how to understand regional accents - Scottish dramas such as Taggart will no longer be broadcast with subtitles. While we're talking! about regions, you must learn that there is no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county is Devon. If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all American States will become shires, e.g. Texasshire, Floridashire, Louisianashire.
4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as the good guys. Hollywood will be required to cast English actors to play English characters. British sit-coms such as The Office, Men Behaving Badly or Red Dwarf will not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy American audience who can't cope with the humour of occasional political incorrectness.
5. You should relearn your original national anthem, God Save The Queen, but only after fully carrying out task #1. We would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.
6. You should stop playing American football. There is only one kind of football. What you refer to as American football is not a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays American football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are hoping to get together at least a US Rugby sevens side by 2007. You should stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play a girls' game called rounders, which is baseball without fancy team strip, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.
7. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because we don't believe you are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous items, you will require a permit if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.
8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called Indecisive Day.
9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips. Fries aren't even French, they are Belgian though 97.85% of you (including the guy who discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country called Belgium. Those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut and fried in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer, which should be served warm and flat. Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.
11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of Boston itself.
12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all, it is lager. From November 1st only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. The substances formerly known as American Beer will henceforth be referred to as Near-Frozen Knat's Urine, with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser company whose product will be referred to as Weak Near-Frozen Knat's Urine. This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured for the last 1000 years in Pilsen, Czech Republic) to be sold without risk of confusion.
13. From November 10th the UK will harmonise petrol (or Gasoline, as you will be permitted to keep calling it until April 1st 2007) prices with the former USA. The UK will harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the Former USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices (roughly $6/US gallon - get used to it).
14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.
15. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy.
16. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due (backdated to 1776).
Thank you for your co-operation.

"Let the eagles soar. Shoot down the turkeys."

First Order Condition...

There was a boy called Peter, he hated remembering things, so he became creative.


But he remaied true to the truths of reality, refusing to accept the mumbo-jumbo of science.

Yet he always remembered the important things...

In his groove he knew the answers to impossible questions

But all this power drove him to madness... and an unfortunate end.

In his fond memory, each year, we award the Retard Hat prize.

Long live Peter.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Seriously??!

So a friend of mine just sent me this AMAZINGLY bizarre article about a woman who didn't even know she was pregnant until she was about to give birth because she was obese. So obese that her layers of fat covered up the baby kicking and whatnot. I am not kidding. Read about it here. I just had to share because really, how often do you read about something like this? Just crazy.

A Series of Unfortunate Events...

Ordinary day...Friday morning...usual classes...got up early in the morning...and I was walking to school - half asleep. Suddenly my eyes fell on a shiny piece of metal. 'Today sure has to be one lucky day...I found a 1 pound coin, and the weather is awesome too.'

Level 1 - Reached my first lecture...boring...fell asleep as usual...when I got up at the end of the lecture, the professor was staring at me. Who cares? Then I went to the next class...the teacher who never bothered to ask anyone a question in the past kept on picking on me (just me) the entire period. Even other classes seemed different. Societies and clubs that advertise on the main street of LSE also decided to stop my way with 'Join us for a trip to...', 'Awesome party tonight...full of hot girls...', etc, etc. Even the Christian missionaries decided to stop me twice, not once, asking me to join their Bible awareness or I-love-Jesus programs. It was then I realized something wasn't normal that day. Just like everybody else in this world, I started thinking that the free money I found that day was probably cursed.

Level 2 - In the middle of another of my lecture, I realized that I had an assignment due in about an hour. I thought if I hurried, I could finish it in time and hence, decided to go to LSE's famous Garrick cafe and do my work...reached there...grabbed a table...took my papers out and started writing. But the deluge of phone calls I kept on getting made me feel that there was actually some 'dark force' trying to prevent me from completing my work. Smart as I was, I decided to leave my phone on the table rather than keep it in my pocket and take it back out every ten seconds.

Level 3 - A Chinese couple decided to take a share of my table with an excuse that there wasn't any free table around. They sat down and started talking to each other at the top of their voices. To make it worse, they kept on switching places for some reason. I was simply going crazy. Then they decided to leave silently. I took a deep breath and thought I would finally be able to make full utilization of my remaining time. But my happiness was broken when a sheet of paper attached to a clipboard hindered my work. I turned around to see two European women asking me to donate some money for the 'Dumb & Deaf Organization'. I checked my wallet but realized that I had no money on me, except the coin I found that morning. I gave it to them and they left. They didn't even say a word during that whole process. Then later, when it was class time, I cleared up the table and as usual, double checked if I had left anything and walked out. After 10-15 steps, I realized that there was something missing...my phone!

Level 4 - Obviously, my phone got stolen...those Chinese did a really smart job - grabbed my phone while I was looking out of the window and then they left without a sound. The worse part was I wouldn't be able to identify them if I saw them again...as I had never bothered to look at them in such detail. I rushed to one of the phone booths - called my phone...the phone was switched off. Then I called Maity using my last coin I had with the hope to make several more calls using his phone after meeting him. I thought if nothing else, I would be able to call my network with that. Thanks to the classes we had, I met him after two hours. And he didn't have the network's number. So, I decided to go back home after dinner and call the network then. The shitty dinner and the rain while coming back couldn't add much to my misery. After some problems with the stupid automated phone call, I was finally able to bar calls to/from my phone.

The Ultimate - For two weeks, I was thinking how stupid I was and how skilled those Chinese were that day. But things changed when my monthly bill arrived. I was supposed to pay 35 pounds monthly...the bill showed 125. I realized that the phone had been used for all of the three hours it had after it was stolen. Those bastards were using it to make international calls for the entire period. With some research, I came to realize something that surprised me even further. It wasn't the Chinese but the freaking 'Dumb & Deaf Organization' women who did it. The calls were made to Romania. The whole attempt to use the clipboard as a shield, blocking my view, not saying a word and leaving the place as soon as they were done all made sense then. The worst part - my super-smart mind had made me cancel my insurance policy just a month before it was stolen. Thought it wouldn't be a smart idea to spend 10 pounds a month just on the insurance.

They weren't satisfied with the 200 pounds phone...they had to take full advantage of it. And, now I have to take the full burden of it.

They have taken the 'cursed' coin...and since they have it now...I might as well curse it further.
But what if they don't any more? Should I still curse it?

Thursday, March 01, 2007

You're gonna die, clown!

Spoof of David Blaine.



This clip reminded me of Arrested Development. Such a great show.
Michael: So this is a magic trick, huh?
Gob: Illusion, Michael. A trick is something a whore does for money.

Regular Karma

Yesterday sucked.

I first found out that my planned trip to Spain, Portugal and Morocco were down the drain, because the earliest visa appointment date I could get was the 16th of April, when my trip was actually supposed to end. Not to mention I'm going to lose all my flight bookings... now there's a hundred quid well spent. And it was Holy Week too... For the first time I realised how much it sucked to have an Indian passport.

Later in the evening my friend called and since she too was depressed for her own reasons, we decided to watch a movie to cheer up... and I got ice-cream too!

"The Last King of Scotland" is undoubtedly one of the best "historical" movie I've seen since "Motorcycle Diaries". Forest Whitaker was brilliantly gruesome as Idi Amin. True, one might draw parallels to "Hotel Rwanda", but it's still a bloody good movie. Watch it. The movie was great but it was as much fun as playing with asbestos and did nothing to improve my mood.

Being a student of economics I'm waiting for the trade-off for my run of shit luck.